A Gift For You…

I sometimes get frustrated when I knit gifts for people, and I don’t think this frustration is unusual. I want the gift receiver to love and cherish their gift, but I also want to be acknowledged for the gift. Because I created this object, the object itself now has significance to me; in fact it has much more significance to me than something I purchase. After all, anyone can go out and buy a gift. Not every one can create a gift. It may not be significant to the recipient, but it IS significant to me, and I feel like the recipient should be made aware of that.

Most of the people I routinely knit for get this. For example, both my daughter and daughter-in-law are such fun to knit for. If my time and funds were both unlimited, I would knit all the projects for them. They both routinely help choose project, pattern, yarn and most importantly, use the knitted objects that I make for them. I like including them in the process and keeping them updated on the progress.

For each of the pieces shown below, my daughter and daughter-in-law were heavily engaged in the creative process: choosing, modifying, or helping to design the pattern, and choosing the yarn.

I try not to surprise people with gifts anymore, because tastes in knitted objects differ widely. I find I’m far more likely to get positive feedback and see the person using the object if I include the recipient in the process, like I do with my daughter and daughter-in-law. However, sometimes I will knit something as a gift without the recipient’s input. This is when I find it especially helpful to include a note that explains the significance of the gift. I feel like if I could just find the right words to include with the gift, I might better communicate the significance of time and energy I spend creating something special, just for them. After all, I only do this for few very special people in my life.

I have a couple of templates for notes that I use when I give gifts, and I’ve included them below. Please feel free to update and use with your own hand-knit gifts.

Dear (Friend), You are a special person in my life and that is why I have made this hand-knitted (insert object name) just for you. I hope you will cherish this gift. I chose the pattern and yarn with you in mind. I enjoyed making this for you because with each stitch, I was thinking fondly of you. I hope that every time you see it/use it/wear it you will think fondly of me as well. Since I am still learning my craft and honing my skills, there are likely to be mistakes in this (object). Please consider it a symbol of our relationship and treat it carefully: Hand Wash, Dry Flat, Do Not Wring or Stretch, Do Not Iron. I would love to have a photo of you using the/wearing the (insert object name).

The next template is specialized for a wedding gift (specifically wedding lace). I created this when a dear friend of mine got married. It describes some of the techniques used in the lace along with a wee bit of marital advice.* The original note was sappy and I cried a lot while I was writing it to my dear, dear friend.

*Note: I’m not qualified to give marital advice.

After modifying it and removing some of the more personal notes, I have used some of the wording again for other wedding lace gifts.

Beaded Wedding Shawl/Lace

As my hands were working, I was thinking about you. Each stitch in this shawl/lace represents a prayer for you, a loving thought, and an inward smile.

The knit and purl stitches produce the body of the fabric. These are the most abundant stitches in the shawl/lace. In the wedding shawl/lace, these stitches represent the daily routine in a marriage. Though not always exciting, these stitches produce the body of the knitted fabric. Without these, the shawl/lace would have no shape. These abundant stitches represent our daily routines: the “please,” the “thank you,” and the “I love you” that we share with our loved one every day.

The Knit Two Together and Slip, Slip, Knit stitches are leaning stitches. A beautiful symmetric pattern emerges when these stitches are used together. These stitches represent the times you lean on each other, with each one taking a turn leaning and being leaned on.

The Yarn Over stitch produces a hole in the fabric. These holes may seem like a problem, but with the right perspective, they make a beautiful pattern. The yarn over stitch represents disappointment and setback. No one looks forward to disappointments and setbacks, just as no one looks forward to a hole in the fabric. But, just like holes in the knitted fabric, we should try to use our setbacks to our advantage and emerge with something beautiful as a result.

The Yarn Over stitch is often used in combination with the leaning stitches. This is a reminder that when we have a disappointment in life we should lean on each other for support.

Knit Three Together: These stitches are often at the center of a pattern. They represent the times that we lean not only on our spouse, but also on our families, our friends, and/or our faith.

Make one stitch, right and Make one stitch, left: These stitches each make a new stitch and increase the size of the fabric. These stitches are balanced at the center and on the edges of the shawl. These stitches represent the new memories and experiences you will have together. A relationship will thrive and grow with new experiences together.

This wedding shawl/lace has beads. Most of the beads are placed on the stitch before it is knit. This is a Bead Before stitch. These shiny little beacons symbolize the happy moments, the laughter, and the joys we anticipate.  Some of the beads – not many – are placed on the stitch after it is knit. This is a Bead After stitch. These beads symbolize those experiences that we may not be able to smile or laugh about until much time has passed.

Mistakes and flaws – they are there. If you go looking for them, you will find them. In life or knitting, seeing the beauty of the whole rather than focusing on the mistake or flaw is a true gift.

The pattern of the shawl/lace is a combination of ALL the stitches. The boring and mundane, the holey stitches, the leaning stitches, the new stitches, and the beaded stitches all combine to produce the pattern of the beautiful fabric that we see. The crescent shape of this shawl/lace symbolizes arms wrapping around to embrace you.

 When you wear this lace, remember that you are loved!

I hope you find these templates useful. If you have other ideas about how to convey the significance of giving or receiving hand made gifts (of any type), please let me know!